Saturn vs. Uranus!!

Have you noticed a certain lack of reasonable causal flow lately? Have you noticed a tendency for folks to say and do pretty much whatever, totally at random, with no real reason other than “because I felt like it”?

Have you noticed that it’s not just people, it’s the damn Universe as a whole?

On September 5, the Sun officially jumpstarts the Saturn/Uranus opposition along the Virgo/Pisces axis—there’s simply no way that this one’s going to sneak into orb without anyone noticing. Subtlety will not rule the day, nor will the normal conventions of cause and effect. Predictability has been chucked out the window—too bad for those walking by underneath—and the only sure bet is that anything can happen.

Uranus is one of the planets whose action isn’t really noticeable until he’s activated. Over the past few weeks, Mars, Mercury, and Venus have made their initial flyby oppositions to Uranus (Mars on August 6, Mercury & Venus together on August 23) and if you think Uranus was agitated then....

Saturn, as a metaphorical planetary energy, is just about as diametrically opposed to Uranus as it gets. Saturn’s style is all bureaucracy, budgets, and Thou Shalt Nots. Uranus has hair like Einstein, the mind of a hacker king, and zero interest in rules...well, not zero interest...he actually pays careful attention to rules, right before he conscientiously flushes them down the commode.

Considering the fact that Saturn is in “let’s-analyze-this” Virgo, and Uranus is in “boundaries-are-for-weenies” Pisces, this opposition will center around issues of method. The random, intuitive leaps of Uranus in Pisces will be challenged by the consolidating efforts of Saturn in Virgo. Uranus wants no truck with “how we’ve done it before,” and Saturn wants no part of any untested, impractical ideas. The push-me-pull-you effect of these two giants will affect all of us, from the lowliest blogger to the loftiest player of world politics.

Uranus will be agitated, all right. Expect drama.

It’s tough to be more specific than that—we are dealing with Uranus, after all—but in general this opposition will affect the mutable signs most noticeably. All Virgos and Pisceans are on the hook, as are Gemini and Sagittarius. Taurus and Scorpio stand to benefit as the dust settles; the inevitable endings and beginnings associated with this opposition will leave openings that may perfectly suit these fixed signs. Cancer and Capricorn can also benefit, though they’ll be dealing with Pluto as well, and will have their own set of challenges to face.

Let’s get back to the mutable signs. Virgo and Pisces are in for the transformative experience of a lifetime. Habits and assumptions will be under constant challenge, and at times, these two signs may be tempted to withdraw.

Virgos (or Virgo planets) will have this feeling that any move they make will result in a quick fall from a steep cliff. None of the familiar conditioned responses are working, and every situation will seem to require a seat-of-the-pants response that is unplanned (based on past experience) and illogical (based on common sense.)

Some may retaliate with excessive organization. Obsessive tendencies will be exacerbated, and I’d advise Virgo to take up an active relaxation practice now. Uranian energy is both mentally and physically agitating, so a physical activity that also requires the interactive use of your brain, such as tennis or racquetball, would be ideal. This goes for Virgo Ascendant and Virgo Mars folks, too.

Pisces will also be compulsive, but in a different way; they’ll be tougher than usual to pin down. Escapism could become an issue. Unexpected choices will pop up like Whack-A-Moles, and the Piscean reaction will be unpredictable.

Part of the time, you’ll find them crumpled on the floor, cradling the mallet-on-a-string like a dead puppy, rocking back and forth and gently weeping. At other times, they’ll take one look at those damned idiot moles and promptly set fire to the whole machine, giggling the giggle of the seriously unstable.

And at yet other times, they’ll try the oldest Piscean trick in the book—they’ll engulf the challenger Saturn like an amoeba, mimicking him so well that even Old Father Time himself has to step back and frown, “I say, isn’t that going rather too far?” Since there are few things more implacable than a Piscean pretending to be Saturn, watch your ass. The floor-whimpering and insane laughter are probably less dangerous.

Gemini and Sagittarius will also get in on the fun, but won't be subject to quite as much interior morphology. This opposition will lie square to these two signs; most of the Saturn/Uranus tension will happen around them, instead of inside them.

This will not be a quiet year for Gemini and Sagittarius, and they won’t have the same temporary-insanity benefits as their cousins Virgo and Pisces, either. Gemini in particular will have issues with mental overload and insomnia—read Virgo's advice above, because it holds for you, too. Sagittarius will face unexpected obstacles, and may have trouble with impulse control.

Late-born Geminis and Sagittarians (and late-degree Ascendants) are most susceptible, as are any planets in the late degrees of these two signs.

There’ll be plenty more to come, as this volatile aspect gets off the ground this fall. It won’t be exact until next year, but if forming aspects are like movies...the previews are over, folks, and the first scene will start in media res early this month. Sometimes you have to wonder: who’s up there selling the tickets?

And just when do we get our royalty checks?